Archive for 2009|Yearly archive page

Papa John, our lord and savior

In Uncategorized on February 6, 2009 at 11:24 pm

Papa John’s Pizza founder, John Schnatter, revealed some earth shattering information during a recent BBC interview.

“Pizza’s actually healthy for you if you don’t eat too much of it,” Schnatter said, adding, “You can’t eat five or six slices but if you eat one or two slices it’s very nutritious.”

So, let me get this straight. Eating too much pizza is bad for you?

Really? I thought the extra 5 pounds I’m carting around since the Super Bowl was from eating too much salad.

If only I’d known this just a week before. Geez!


“Red 5, come in Red 5!!!”

In Uncategorized on February 5, 2009 at 11:44 pm

I’ve  discovered some pretty troubling images out there when one merely Googles “Red 5 Luke Skywalker.”


As most of you know, “Red 5” was our venerable hero’s call sign when he flew the fabled mission in his X-wing fighter to destroy the Deathstar….whew…just describing that takes it out of me, anway….

…little did I know that a gigantic feline (sorry cat lovers) almost destroyed the entire mission!


Facebook turns 5!

In Uncategorized on February 5, 2009 at 9:03 pm


Yes, the uberpopular social networking website, Facebook, turned a robust 5 years old yesterday.

Started by a Harvard student to enable friends to keep up with each other, it now boasts some 150 million-plus users worldwide.

It has even been attributed, along with other social networking sites such as Myspace, to playing a significant role in the 2008 election of President Barack Obama.

Facebook marked the occasion with family and friends at a local Chuck E. Cheese pizza parlor.


Sadly though, an otherwise jubilant day of celebration was marred slightly when the 5-year-old birthday boy disappeared while playing skeeball.

The day was saved quickly, however, when his loyal nation of members sprang into action, locating FB not 5 minutes later utilizing the “Friend Finder” application.

With a huge sigh of relief, Facebook was found at the Whack-A-Mole game with a complete stranger claiming he “only wanted to offer the youngster free Jonas Brothers tickets….after we found his family first, of course.”


After being debriefed by authorities, an officer asked Facebook “Hey, how old are you today?” And the social networking child prodigy proudly answered “This many!”


Pineapple expressions

In Uncategorized on February 5, 2009 at 8:42 am


So, Michael Phelps smoked some pot?


But, errr, he won like 800 gold medals the last two summer olympics, right?

Well there goes those “drugs are bad”  and “this is your brain on drugs” arguments screaming away down the highway in a confiscated D.A.R.E. Corvette I guess.

Righteous dude, totally righteous.